BY RENEE P. ALDRICH
It is common knowledge that in this country, aging is not celebrated. While there are social services in place to support aging citizens within the community, still there are individual issues around aging that are often not discussed, resulting in a great deal of inequity.
There is ageism; tension among age groups (senior women and younger women specifically); and negative media images of the elderly (especially women), all of which factor in on society’s misconceptions on how it is to age. Negative media images largely focus on lack of capacity as opposed to what seasoned women bring to the table. Here is a look at what it means to age, and what aging actually is and the opportunities that come with aging.
AGING IS what happens if we are lucky, AGING MEANS we have been through some things. AGING IS swift—one day you are 25 or 35 and filled with energy, and parenting young children, you have energy to burn, no thoughts of what you eat, and no thoughts of when you go to bed; you are working, a student, or mapping out your career; and in the next instant you are 60-plus, kids are grown, maybe they are married and have children of their own, your energy level is subpar at best; spicy foods no longer agree with you and you look forward to leaving the party/play or other event so you can go home and go to bed. Plus you are counting down the days till you can retire—if you are lucky.
AGING IS subtle, occurring while you are napping, working, traveling, falling in love, celebrating holidays, or just otherwise just living your life.
AGING MEANS you are not so much concerned with the opinions of others; it MEANS you are smarter, and you cannot be so easily fooled by those trying to use you—but you could be the target of scammers. Aging MEANS that the price you pay for mistakes is a lot less than it was in your 20s or 30s—because you now have wisdom on how to apply your knowledge.
How swift is it, you ask? Well, the timeline between 25 and 65 is approximately three weeks—though in the moment it seems like you have a very long time to meet your goals, write a book, start a business, or even go back to school—but those three weeks fly by.
As a senior woman, I feel particularly qualified to make the above statements and my personal experience demonstrates their merit. However, the real truth is each experience with aging is unique; some sail through the process without a hitch, while some cave to the elements of aging.
Why do we suppose that is? At the end of the day, what aging also affords us is the knowledge that life is about choices. And as long as we are alive, we have the choice of how we want to age—and not waiting until the bottom falls out of the basket to fix it.
I think it is important to add here what aging is not. What aging does not mean is that we are finished just because we have entered the senior space. It does NOT mean that it is too late; “it is never too late” is not a cliché. All those aspirations are still doable, if we do not cave into the so-called diminished capacity reflected in the media. What it does NOT mean is we stop reaching for a dream, or changing something that is NOT working for us.
Mary Kay Ash didn’t like the experience she had in her corporate job—so at age 60 she left it and started a multi-million-dollar company that offered entrepreneurship opportunities for women giving them the opportunity to get rewarded for the effort they put into their businesses. Ms. Flora Hubbard lost her only son at 70 years old. The grief was too much for her, so she began writing poetry. She was so good and prolific she began getting invited to college campuses to do her own poetry performances. She also was honored by college presidents, and performed at both the University of Pittsburgh and Carnegie Mellon University.
The good news is, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to recognize the need for an extra layer of protection as we age. We do that by making the appropriate changes, like stop smoking; commit to moving our bodies, and NOT giving up on the life you want for yourself. These are absolutely essential if we are to age with grace, and not have limited capacity—we may have to do things differently, but we do not have to stop doing them!
So you see, AGING IS and AGING MEANS are interchangeable concepts about that thing that we are all going to face, if we are blessed. And we have the choice of sailing through it, or caving into it. The choice is ours.
