There are many mothers who have suffered through the death of one child.
There are few who have suffered through the death of four.
That is Dolores Pratt Chandler’s story. The Hill District native and Fifth Avenue High School graduate recently penned a book, “Grain of Hope, A Mother’s Memoir,” which details the traumatizing events and then how to stand tall through the pain.
“I’ve experienced the death of four sons. I use my crisis because I don’t think you can find too many crises worse than having a child die,” Chandler said. “There are a lot of mothers suffering in silence—after it leaves the news and after all the hoopla is over, the mother is left to suffer in silence.”
Chandler’s sons were diagnosed with Conradi-Hunnerman syndrome. The National Organization for Rare Disorders defines it as a rare genetic disorder characterized by skeletal malformations, skin abnormalities and cataracts. It is caused by an X-linked dominant trait that occurs almost exclusively in girls; boys born with the syndrome usually do not survive. An estimated one in 400,000 newborns is born with the disorder. Symptoms and severity can vary among individuals, but cataracts, spinal curvature, sparse or coarse scalp hair and scaling of the skin are common.
Chandler’s oldest son, Glenn, was 22 months old when he died. Her second son, Tyrone, lived to the age of 22. Patrick died a few hours after birth. And Chandler’s fourth son died five months into her pregnancy. She calls him, “Baby Boy” Williams.
“Tyrone was a people person, and everybody that came in contact with him was attached to him like a magnet,” Chandler recalled. “He was very spiritual and upbeat, even with all the problems that he had, you would have never known.”
Chandler has one daughter, Sonja, who is now 51. She said with the situations occurring with her sons, she didn’t focus too much on Sonja—which later became a problem. “When something like a crisis occurs in a family, sometimes we spend all of our time focusing on the crisis and not on the people it impacts. I spent a lot of time with my sons but I pushed away my daughter. As a result, she was suffering herself.”
“Grain of Hope” helps people overcome serious problems one may encounter in life—divorce, betrayal of a loved one, and the death of a child. “It’s a book that helps people to understand the dying process and all the emotional ups and downs you go through,” Chandler said.
“Dolores has been a complete joy to work with over the past few years,” said the book’s publisher The Church Online in a statement. “Her presence brings with it a hopeful sense of serenity. She speaks wisdom with every comment, and one can’t help but hang on to every word she speaks. ‘Grain of Hope’ is the perfect book to pick up if you’re struggling and in need of a little hope and inspiration to continue moving forward. All at once tragic and uplifting, ‘Grain of Hope’ is a memoir that will stick with you long after its final pages have been turned.”
Chandler told the New Pittsburgh Courier the only way she was able to get through the tough times was with hope. It’s the best way for anyone else to get through the bad times as well.
“I want (the reader) to know that even though you have come to the lowest part of your life, hope can elevate you to the point of acceptable peace,” Chandler said. “The most special thing is to activate the spirit of hope that’s in them. We all get it. You don’t have to be a Christian, all you have to do is be a person. We’re all born with the ability to have hope.”
The nearly 200-page book is available on Amazon, ITunes and Nook. More information, including contact details for Chandler can be found at www.doloresprattchandler.com.
“I kept believing and hoping that each day would get better,” Chandler said. “You never give up holding on for a better day. Hope says you can make it and things are going to get better.”
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