Newsflash. It is no longer cool to watch a primetime episode of “Cops” profiling a drunken, angry and out of control spouse/macho man (sporting a clean white “wife beater” along with a signature pair of battered Levi jeans and cowboy boots with a bottle of spirits or a six pack sitting on the coffee table for all of America to see) armed with a slurred speech monologue trying to convince the police that “she hit me first.”
Finally, the “bile” known as domestic abuse is in the process of being addressed and removed from the core of the NFL as well as the American psyche.
The reason that I say “addressed” as opposed to “purged” is because even when a cure for cancer is finally “uncovered” there will surely be a group of human beings living somewhere on the this earth that will continue to suffer and perish from the disease unaware of the remedy or unable to have access to it.
But alas, even sitting federal judges are now being busted for domestic abuse as a result of ex-Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice being exposed and justifiably penalized for traumatizing his fiancé now wife.
For generations, upper class spousal abuse was easily and purposely hidden behind invisible walls of MasterCards and Visas without limits, coupled with amenities of filet mignon and truffle stuffed rock lobster tails.
The perpetrators of these cowardly acts of violence toward women were formerly protected by layers upon layers of antiquated laws but their acts now being exposed by diamond encrusted searchlights, illuminating and exposing violators hiding in the dark alleys where the upper one percent toss their iniquities along with the trash because after all, every kiss does begin with Kay, right?
Let’s pick a few morsels of meat off of this bone that has already been shared with almost everyone that will listen.
A book written over a decade ago by Susan Weitzman, Ph.D titled; “Not to People Like Us” Hidden Abuse In Upscale Marriages profiles horror stories of spousal abuse in upper class families interviews women from wealthy and successful marriages who were forced to submit to abuse with generally little or no fanfare.
One of the subjects named “Sally” was quoted by the author revealing that; “She [Sally] gave elegant dinner parties only to be brutally beaten afterwards for offering some of her husband’s favorite dessert for admiring guest’s to take home.”
I don’t know the circumstances in regards to the Ray and Janay Rice situation but I am willing to bet my left leg that it is not based on something as trivial as Mrs. Rice being a bit too philanthropic with Ray’s leftover dessert from a dinner party.
I forgot to mention that the name of “Sally’s” husband is “Ray.”
The author goes on to say that Sally wryly commented that; “this is not what Martha Stewart had in mind.”
Wait am I missing something? What commissioners are taking the heat for the abuse of these upper crust victims?
The American legal system is the “commissioner” for everyday women and based on the number of women that have been assaulted and murdered in the past, in light of “protection from abuse” orders issued by the courts, they have not come close to “getting it right.”
The website www.feminist.org publishes a slightly different view on the subject stating that; “African-American women experience more domestic violence than White women in the age group of 20-24. However, Black and White women experience the same level of victimization in all other age categories.”
H’mm, very interesting. There used to be a popular “Stoney’s” beer commercial aired when I was in my youth, it went something like this; “pour me a Stoney’s fetch me my beer, pour me a Stoney’s that’s why I’m here.”
Now that’s deep, really deep. Even fifty years ago if you told a Black woman to “fetch” anything you would be “fetching” your suitcase to sleep in the doghouse with Fido or on your way to sleep at your mommas house.
We keep hearing about advertisers possibly taking action against the NFL. Male chauvinism has been practiced for over the past two thousand years or more. What makes you think that the “Flintstone” mentality of our society can be eradicated in a mere one hundred years, especially by a sports league?
First and foremost, it is not the job of Roger Goodell to act as a chaperone in the private lives of grown — folks.
He was not the one who committed these atrocious acts against his spouse, so remove the albatross from around his neck.
If I were Roger Goodell I would have made an attempt to protect my income and my NFL “family” as well.
However, when any man is given too much power that person may find it easier and more convenient to penalize offenders for violations but far more hesitant to act when it comes to the dispensation of mercy.
Aubrey Bruce can be reached at: abruce@newpittsburghcourier.com or 412.583.6741
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